Tag Archives: Relationships

How movies are giving our generation a false idea of relationships.

In a time where media is huge influence on most people we are seeing movies like The Notebook,Serendipity, and pretty much any other Nicholas Sparks movie you can think of or any Romantic movie (not to hate on Nicholas Sparks he has written some books that were turned into some fantastic movies.) All these films put that lackluster ideas in the minds of the viewers. Dr Bjarne Holmes, a psychologist who led the research said in an article in the Times  (click on link to see the article) “Relationship counselors often face common misconceptions in their clients — that if your partner truly loves you they’d know what you need without you communicating it, that your soul mate is predestined. We did a rigorous content analysis of romantic comedies and found that the same issues were being portrayed in these films,”

So then we have to ask ourselves where is this false idea of Romance and dating coming from? Is it pre incorporated in our minds or installed by the misconceptions we find in these films. Personally I think it is installed in our minds by these romantic comedy idea of finding the “Perfect” love and that if its meant to be then it will come around to the guy magically sweeping the girl off her feet and or coming to her rescue from the wrong guy. While I think these movies are great (my favorite movie The Adjustment Bureau is a Romantic kind of action combined movie.) I just think they portray the wrong idea to the viewers. Not many if any relationship is going to be you meet once a spark starts and you magically fall head over heels for each other. (Being a realist here!) It will take time and effort for that relationship to grow and become great. We as a generation need to start focusing on building strong relationships rather than hanging on this false idea of the “perfect” relationship. This may be a real shocker to some but there is no such thing as a perfect relationship every relationship has their ups and downs and thats what in the end will make them stronger.

Now I am not saying that movies are the cause of bad relationships but if you look back at your parents generation, your grandparents generation they had much stronger relationships where guys came to the door with flowers and they focused on building a solid foundation rather than look for perfect from the start. They also did not have movies influencing their idea of what “Love” and dating so that probably helped too.